remembering

Well, I'm still seething about this annoying neighbor but I am also well past the point where I could fall into unforgiveness. Unforgiveness is pretty ugly in God's eyes. And as it is written, "Forgive us as we forgive."

Most folks seem to have this weird idea that if we simply ask God to forgive us, he has to forgive us. Not true. He may forgive us but he doesn't have to. And as the parable of the unforgiving steward showed us...if we can't forgive our enemy, there is no way God can forgive us. Blood of Jesus or not.

Yes, yes, I hear some folks saying, "The blood of Jesus covers all sins." Ah, does it now? Do you really want to hold onto your unforgiveness on the off-chance that the blood of Jesus will prevent you from going to hell? Heck, the book of Revelations tells us that outside the gate are "pimps, cowards, etc." No word said about whether those cowards are believers or not. John tells us, "he that hates his brother hasn't got eternal life in him."

So yeah, there is something about hatred that somehow destroys the efficacy of the Blood of Jesus. Again, I don't want to push it too far and say that Jesus' blood doesn't cover ALL sins, but really...do you honestly WANT to be in the throes of unforgiveness when you die?

I'm remembering all this because back in the day someone had hurt me so bad...and had caused me such terrible grief...that I developed a hatred for her. A hatred so bad I simply was wracked with it. (Okay, you all know I have a terrible temper, but temper is one thing and unforgiveness quite another. I get p*ssed and scream but I generally stop disliking the person by the next day. Unforgiveness, well, that baby takes over.)

So anyway, there I was...in the terrible pain of hurt and simply hating this horrendous person...when suddenly -- i mean just like that!-- I was someplace else. I was in my room on my bed at the beginning, mind you. Then the next thing I knew I was in hell. Falling, falling, falling. No end of the falling. Yep, the bottomless pit. All around me were all kinds of creatures -- very filthy creatures. And all sorts of sewage and refuse. And I was just falling, and falling, and falling, and falling. Endlessly falling. I cannot describe to you how terrible this all was.

Okay, some of you might not believe me. But some of you have. You too have had glimpses of hell or demons or whatever. But even if you haven't, I'm giving you my testimony and my testimony is true. Keeping unforgiveness in your heart just isn't worth going to hell.

At the end of the vision, I had returned to my room and the hatred against the person who had hurt me was mysteriously gone --after about two weeks of overwhelming me-- and my life was forever changed. Heck, I'd love to sit here hating my creepy neighbor...but certain things....well, let's just say I remember my short little stay in hell. And I DO not want to make that stay permanent. God bless.