Okay, so am on a fast from television for Lent. I figured it'd be easier than avoiding a food and it'd help me control what comes into my mind. But aaargh, it's getting hard.
For one, I use TV as my comforter. It keeps me from getting too overwhelmed with my blues or whatever hits me. So now I have to face my weird issues and grief without cake to dull them (diet) and without the din. Whatever shall I do? I'm trusting that this will strengthen my soul, though. Each day I come downstairs and do NOT turn on the TV, is a strengthening of the soul.
Okay, so...next: Well, am stepping out in the belief that I am actually liked. Very hard to do after one has been clobbered by creepy people. (but I will not whine.)
Next.... trying to figure out if the ending of Constant Tower is right. Haven't reached the ending yet in my revisions...but ya know... a girl's got to think ahead. I think Ephan carries my grief at not belonging...and Psal carries my anger at the herd mind. And Maharai carries my need for the loving family and the devastation of the lost family. But honestly, is she vengeful? Would she bond with her new family and thus...not be able to kill them? Ah, it's all a blur right now. Am feeling that I'll be super-surprised at how this story comes out....yeah, cause I'm rethinking that ending. Thing is, though, I have to finish it by April. Cause by then the Delacorte contest will be over and I intend to have won it...so I'll be working with the editors to perfect Onion for them. Positive speaking, uh?
Am realizing also that I would make a crappy feminist if I were one. As the mother of a son, I'm totally into seeing the troubles men have to deal with. A white feminist friend of mine asked why I made a non-black boy my main character...and alas, I had no real sound reason. I guess I could say that the "boy goes on a journey" theme is so with me that my mind is trapped within the paradigm and I can't get it out. But...who knows? Boys just come to my mind to tell their stories. They're rarely white, though...usually Native American or Asian. Although Psal is bi-racial: black and white.
What else? Well, it looks like younger son is finally going to school tomorrow. He's gone about fourteen days all semester...since September. But we went to his allergist -- whose existence I had all but forgotten until God reminded me-- and he's really on the ball and really has helped us with it.
In addition, we're reading the Bible out loud every day...from cover to cover. Am sure that's helping. Unemployment still around. Can't really see where money is coming from. But the Lord keeps telling me not to be afraid. And finally, I have some peace...and ability to trust. Just gotta find myself and my trust for CT.
That's about it. -C
- ► 2017 (16)
- ► 2015 (32)
- ► 2014 (63)
- ► 2013 (80)
- ► 2012 (119)
- ► 2011 (198)
- Always Remember
- Decolonizing God: The Bible in the Tides of Empire...
- Look, Mom, a Nigger
- Moses just can't seem to get over it
- Okay, am in Deuteronomy
- General Update
- the deliberate dumbing down of america - A Chronol...
- WTF Moment in Bible Study: Aaron's Rod that Budded...
- Bernice Johnson Reagon in conversation
- All the Scholar Ladies!
- Ah, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers
- How to say "I love you" in ten languages
- Esther Wahome - Yahwe
- War Child -- Documentary on Child Soldiers in Suda...
- Decision Made
- One Church Many Tribes, by Native American pastor,...
- Divorce dreams, child of divorce issues
- Made it through the Abraham story
- My Saviour My God by Aaron Shust
- ▼ February (23)
- ► 2009 (499)
- ► 2008 (353)
- ► 2007 (102)
Here is a Bible study I wrote once. Instead of simply writing a long article, I simply listed some of the many questions God asks in the Bi...
William Lau of the Elijah Challenge does a rally great job talking about the priestly authority, the kingdom authority, and the prophetic au...
Is there a right way to read it? Should the books be read in any particular order? Most Churches have printed guides which help parishioner...
Once Jesus was praying in a certain place. After he had finished, one of his disciples said to him, "Lord, teach us to pray, as John ta...
This prayer was written by Rich Keltner: Right now, In the Name of the Lord Jesus and by the power of His Blood, I ask the blood o...
I once had a white friend in my writer’s critique group ask me, “Why do you always write about mixed couples? That’s a very bad habit of you...
Am getting back into The Constant Tower. WOW!!! It's so good to be back into a fantastical world. The nobility, the beauty, the angst --...
Hi all: I'm up today for the spec-fic blog hop: Thanks to Jessica Rydill , author of Malarat and Children of the Shaman for ...
Types of Bible Studies: Bible studies may be done singly or as a series. 1. A Bible Study Series can be thematic. Thematic articles can...
Yesterday, early-early, I opened my computer: you were there. A glimpse, merely But later, all my thoughts were of you. II Men should...