Sunday, January 06, 2008

Gossip, the media and The Other Woman blues

I'm feeling sorry for Britney Spears. I always liked her. I always got majorly peeved at the way the media and those oh so perfect anchor women mocked and sneered at her. They had that "she is so unlike the perfect we" attitude that made me want to call up and say, "Excuse me, I am like Brit...even if you're not. I'm normal folks." (I won't go on about how much I dislike TV reporter types. I'll just say they seem to think that all their viewers are out of Ozzie and Harriet. Who do they think they're reporting to?) Watching the news yesterday about her meltdown she reminded me of all those other "other women" who have suffered after they get the philandering guy.

But first a word about my father. He cheated on my mother during their brief marriage and dumped her at last when he met the woman who would become my stepmother. That woman, my stepmother, finally left him after suffering years of heartache because of his cheating on her and died at her workstation of a heart attack full of grief and suffering. My mother grieved all her life because she lost my father ...but it was truly a blessing. She was freed from a philandering abuser she was too in love with to divorce.

Then there's Stacy Peterson -- She got the guy after the guy's wife mysteriously dies in bath tub. She reportedly was seeing him during the marriage. Now she's "missing" and Drew Peterson is a "person of interest" in her death.

Mariah Carey -- got the guy (Tommy Mottola) --and tons of platinum records-- after getting from Tommy's then wife. But then divorces him and there's all this hint about her personal distress while she was married to him.

And of course, Britney who got Kevin Federline after Federline left his then-pregnant girlfriend Shar Jackson and his young child. Now, she's lost her kids in a custody battle. One might wonder why Britney should lose her kids when it was Kevin who was supposedly cheating on her in the marriage. Because the guy so destroyed her ego and self-esteem that she has apparently been melting down ever since he left her.

Some guys are just bad news and it amazes me that so many women lose their minds when they fall in love with such men. My mother used to say if a guy cheats with you he will cheat on you. I'll only add, if a guy kills his first wife and marries you, there's a pretty good chance he might not be too great about your feelings too.

Why do we humans -- especially when we're in love-- think that a guy might be mean to someone else but will be kind to us? And why don't we believe in the old adage, "What goes around comes around?" Hey, Solomon said so in the Book of Ecclesiastes. St Paul said it. There's a proverb that goes, "fools learn by experience; wise men learn by authority." Let's keep our self safe and just trust what the old wives and what the authority has said.

Strange that we all think "what goes around comes around" and "payback is a bitch" but we really don't want to believe that spiritual laws would ever affect us? Nah, karma is not a thing to play with. None of us deserve the suffering we sometimes get from the romantic unthinking cruel thing we do to others. Although Britney took Kevin away from his pregnant baby-mamma (a blessing for Shar Jackson) Britney doesn't deserve to lose her children. Yet that, unfortunately, is the way things work. We don't see the spiritual effects of our actions that often, or else we don't recognize it. But trust's there. Payback occurs.

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