Weird Prayer One and Two

Okay, so this morning I get up and tossed up two weird prayers to God.

First:
I'm in the throes of admiration for testosterone. I love men. I love lovely men. So I'm thinking, "Lord, no sex in heaven! What about all this admiration I have for men with lovely bodies?" Yep, we have to discuss everything with God.

C S Lewis gave an example. I'll paraphrase: When you tell a small boy that being in love is wonderful, he says so it's like chocolate? That's cause the highest joy a little kid knows is the joy of candy. (Or Nintendos or PSP's) He can't conceive of anything higher. And that's how we humans are when we try to understand what Jesus said about heaven and there not being marriage in heaven. The first thing we feel is a sense of loss. Oh, okay, there are these super-spiritual folks who can live without sex or that wonderful sense of admiring another. And hey, I can understand the joy of loving everyone as my brother and sister.

But there is something wonderful about the sex drive. There is something wonderful about men's body's. If God takes it away, he is sure to give something better. I can only tell God that I HOPE so. Come on, now, Solomon wrote an opera to love: The Song of Solomon. So there's something there to hope for. So, that's weird prayer one.

Then there's weird prayer two:

I got up off the bed this morning and said, "Lord, my ego! Do something to make me not look so nutty in the eyes of certain people!" Yep, I was asking God to sure up my pride, not to destroy it.

Okay, so do I have any precedent to ask such a snooty proud selfish prayer. Well, yeah, Psalm 25: 2

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul;
2 in you I trust, O my God.
Do not let me be put to shame,
nor let my enemies triumph over me.

Okay, okay, enemies can be sickness and sin and demonic forces. But sometimes it's plain old people. And God understands the way we feel when humans triumph over us. There's a lot in the Bible about the proud, the scornful, the mocking, the derisive. Often when I think of Jesus and his triumph over the suffering of the cross, I sometimes think "The pain was bad enough but to be subject to scorn and mockery and to be able to do something about it...and yet...to NOT come down from the cross and "show those a**holes"!!! Well.... that's the love of Jesus for us, that's the need for us to be freed from the depth of sin. Anyways, I'm kinda hoping to be a super-millionaire and to have my son's healing manifest. For happiness sake, but also to shut the mouths of those who have triumphed over me.